On the Lighter Side

“The One enthroned in heaven laughs…” — Psalm 2:4

Christian sayings: 

Don’t let your worries get the best of you. Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited — until you try to sit in their pew. 

Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers. 

It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one. 

The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close. 

When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there. 

People are funny. They want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church. 

Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever. 

Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong. 

If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has. 

God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you? 

Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set. 

Peace starts with a smile. 

I don’t know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from? 

A lot of church members who are singing “Standing on the Promises” are just sitting on the premises. 

We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges. 

Be ye fishers of men. You catch them — He’ll clean them. 

Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous. 

Don’t put a question mark where God put a period. 

Don’t wait for 6 strong men to take you to church. 

Forbidden fruits create many jams. 

God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called. 

God grades on the cross, not the curve. 

God loves everyone, but probably prefers “fruits of the spirit” over “religious nuts!” 

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. 

He who angers you, controls you! 

If God is your Copilot — swap seats! 

Prayer: Don’t give God instructions — just report for duty! 

The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us. 

The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you. 

We don’t change the message, the message changes us. 

You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him. 

The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 
1 cross+3 nails =4 given. 

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to McDonald’s makes you a hamburger. 

There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARK – FOR MEMBERS ONLY! Trespassers will be baptized! 

No God – No Peace. Know God – Know Peace.

Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!

Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin Robbins.

Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!

An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.” 

When the restaurant next to a Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, “Open Sundays,” the church reciprocated with its own message: “We are open on Sundays, too.” 

People are like tea bags — you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.

Fight truth decay — study the Bible daily.

How will you spend eternity – Smoking or Non-smoking?

Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives 

Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.

It is unlikely there’ll be a reduction in the wages of sin.

Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church. 

If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.

If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born from above.

Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain fire insurance, soon! 

This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing? (U R) 

In the dark? Follow the Son. 

Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up.

If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep; talk to the Shepherd.